I am lifestyle provisioner. In a nutshell, my clients hire me as a screener and a sparkplug. As a screener I provide research to narrow down decision alternatives and conduct extensive due diligence. Once a property has been purchased I am the sparkplug to get the whole household furnished and staffed so that my client simply shows up, free to enjoy her life.
I divide my client into 3 tranches - -new locators, relocators, and dislocators. They are all moving, but the emotional context of the move is unique to each tranche. To keep it very high level, in my experience
- New locators are excited, acquiring to accommodate positive personal developments. These are our city space renovators and secondary home buyers.
- Relocators stay positive but are also ambivalent and cautious, acquiring in the shadow of the unknown. These are our executive relocators, retiring couples.
- Dislocators are stressed. I describe them as "hunkered down." A new household is being forced upon them, because of negative spiral in financial circumstances, companionship or health.
For my clients who are facing a move from the 4-6m home, there is shame and confusion and, ultimately, resignation. Here's a rough sketch of how I usually see it:
1. One party borrows against the property to support business investments, adult children, extended family, or lifestyle expenses. Or, (d) all of the above. Although financially savvy, the borrower is embarrassed to be borrowing in the first place, wants it all over with quickly, and assures himself he will pay it off quickly. The financial advisory team has a "let's make it happen" mentality. The loans are low-doc/no-doc with extortionate terms.
2. A business fails or income slows, and the monthly amount due accelerates. Payments fall into arrears. Penalties kick in. The house is carried for about 10 months with increasingly late payments which do not cover the penalty inflated balance. Notice of intent is delivered.
3. Denial, rage, paranoia happen over a period of 6 weeks. The secret becomes burdensome. The spouse is told. The house is staged, landscaped, cleaned and maintained all at the owner's expense to get it sold at a price sufficient to pay the lender. The house is listed.
4. The BFFs think something is wrong but do not conceive that it is financial -- usually a vacation or series of psychotropic medications is recommended and accepted. The pain is postponed. Upon returning from the first vacation, a new financial team of lawyers and realtors goes into action, with the borrower as the sole information exchange. The bank agrees to a stay while the home is on the market, but penalties and interest continue to accrue.
5. Several months pass. The BFF is told about the real reason for the house sale in a conversation about how unbelievable it is the gorgeous home is not selling. The parties agree that something must be wrong -- that the lawyers are no good, that the bank will negotiate, that the realtors are sabotaging the deal. At this point notice of repossession has been received and the family has less than 6 weeks to move.
And this is where I am hired. These clients are exhausted, scared and facing a herculean task of downsizing while ego-bliterated. They are not comfortable turning over the keys, Barbara - - they have been checkmated.
I do not offer an opinion as to how sympathetic (or not) we should be. I will observe that the mechanics are the same as the pay-day loan scandal for the working class or the loan shark for the gambler - - but we articulate much more outrage when it happens to people who "have it made."
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